Spike Jones
Happy New Year

This is my New Year's resolution:
When my mother-in-law begins to yell and shout
Through the window I would like to throw her out.
But I resolve not to do it, here is why:
I'm afraid of hitting someone passing by.
This is my New Year's resolution.

When I'm at the movies watching a love seen
And a lady's hat is blocking half the screen
I resolve not to shout, "Take off that hat!"
I'll remove it gently with a baseball bat.
This is my New Year's Resolution.

When I take a lovely lady out to eat
And she orders caviar instead of meat
I resolve to let the lady have her fill.
And of course I'll also let her pay the bill.
This is my New Year's Resolution.

When I'm sitting with my wifey on a bus
And a dear old lady stands in front of us
I resolve to be a gentleman discreet.
I'll politely offer her my wifey's seat.
This is my New Year's Resolution.

When my mother says, "Come in, it's time to eat."
And I keep on playing games out in the street
I resolve to rush right home now when I'm called
Cause my pop just got a hairbrush and he's bald.
This is my New Year's Resolution.

On the radio this year I hope to score
With some funny jokes you've never heard before.
I resolve not to tell a corny joke.
Hello, what's that? The church burned down? Holy smoke!
This is my New Year's Resolution.

In this coming year I'm going to be discreet.
Have the Slicker's playing music soft and sweet.
I resolve to treat Tchaikovsky tenderly
And set his second movement with TNT.
This is my New Year's Resolution.


Mirror lyrics:

This is my New Year's Resolution.
And set his second movement with TNT.
I resolve to treat Tchaikovsky tenderly
Have the Slicker's playing music soft and sweet.
In this coming year I'm going to be discreet.

This is my New Year's Resolution.
Hello, what's that? The church burned down? Holy smoke!
I resolve not to tell a corny joke.
With some funny jokes you've never heard before.
On the radio this year I hope to score

This is my New Year's Resolution.
Cause my pop just got a hairbrush and he's bald.
I resolve to rush right home now when I'm called
And I keep on playing games out in the street
When my mother says, "Come in, it's time to eat."

This is my New Year's Resolution.
I'll politely offer her my wifey's seat.
I resolve to be a gentleman discreet.
And a dear old lady stands in front of us
When I'm sitting with my wifey on a bus

This is my New Year's Resolution.
And of course I'll also let her pay the bill.
I resolve to let the lady have her fill.
And she orders caviar instead of meat
When I take a lovely lady out to eat

This is my New Year's Resolution.
I'll remove it gently with a baseball bat.
I resolve not to shout, "Take off that hat!"
And a lady's hat is blocking half the screen
When I'm at the movies watching a love seen

This is my New Year's resolution.
I'm afraid of hitting someone passing by.
But I resolve not to do it, here is why:
Through the window I would like to throw her out.
When my mother-in-law begins to yell and shout
This is my New Year's resolution:


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