Apologetix
Hotel Can't Afford Ya (hotel California)

(This is a parody of Hotel California by The Eagles)

From a dark desert highway we pulled into the inn
Rome called for a census, I was from Bethlehem
Up above from a distance a star was giving me light
My wife was heavy ‘cause her child was due
We had to stop for the night

So I stood in the doorway of Bethlehem hotel
And I was thinking to myself "I hope to heaven they'll give me some help"
But they told us no-can-do and they sent me away
"There's a place around the corner though where you both can stay"

Welcome, but the hotel can't afford ya
Such a lovely place but we're out of space
Ran out of room and the hotel can't afford ya
It's the time of year with the census here

My wife was definitely gifted, that's what the Lord's angel said
She was about to have a baby boy while still virgin
Spent the night in the barnyard, cheap slumlord's rent
Some night to remember, some night to forget

So because of what happened I was grieving for my wife
I said "They probably haven't cleaned in here since B.C. 65"
Animal voices were calling for straw and hay
Keeping you up through the middle of the night just as if to say…

Welcome, but the hotel can't afford ya
Such a lovely place, but we're out of space
Holiday rush and the hotel can't afford ya
What a nice surprise for your silent night

He was born that evening and shepherds came that night
And they said "We're all just visitors here of the Holy Christ"
And in an ass's manger, they found the boy asleep
They started getting teary eyed so they went back to their sheep

Last thing I remember there were wise men at the door
They had a bunch of packages from the place they were before
"We're late," said the wise men "We had problems Christmas Eve
We've been checking out your shiny light all through the Middle East"


Mirror lyrics:

We've been checking out your shiny light all through the Middle East"
"We're late," said the wise men "We had problems Christmas Eve
They had a bunch of packages from the place they were before
Last thing I remember there were wise men at the door

They started getting teary eyed so they went back to their sheep
And in an ass's manger, they found the boy asleep
And they said "We're all just visitors here of the Holy Christ"
He was born that evening and shepherds came that night

What a nice surprise for your silent night
Holiday rush and the hotel can't afford ya
Such a lovely place, but we're out of space
Welcome, but the hotel can't afford ya

Keeping you up through the middle of the night just as if to say…
Animal voices were calling for straw and hay
I said "They probably haven't cleaned in here since B.C. 65"
So because of what happened I was grieving for my wife

Some night to remember, some night to forget
Spent the night in the barnyard, cheap slumlord's rent
She was about to have a baby boy while still virgin
My wife was definitely gifted, that's what the Lord's angel said

It's the time of year with the census here
Ran out of room and the hotel can't afford ya
Such a lovely place but we're out of space
Welcome, but the hotel can't afford ya

"There's a place around the corner though where you both can stay"
But they told us no-can-do and they sent me away
And I was thinking to myself "I hope to heaven they'll give me some help"
So I stood in the doorway of Bethlehem hotel

We had to stop for the night
My wife was heavy ‘cause her child was due
Up above from a distance a star was giving me light
Rome called for a census, I was from Bethlehem
From a dark desert highway we pulled into the inn

(This is a parody of Hotel California by The Eagles)


Relevant Tags:
HHotel CCan't AAfford YYa ((hotel CCalifornia) otel an't fford a hotel alifornia) oHtel aCn't fAford aY h(otel aClifornia)
jotel fan't zfford ga (hhotel falifornia) jHotel fCan't zAfford gYa (otel fCalifornia) Hjotel Cfan't Azfford Yga (ohtel Cfalifornia)
uotel xan't qfford ha (jotel xalifornia) uHotel xCan't qAfford hYa (jhotel xCalifornia) Huotel Cxan't Aqfford Yha (hjotel Cxalifornia)
notel van't sfford 6a (uotel valifornia) nHotel vCan't sAfford 6Ya (uhotel vCalifornia) Hnotel Cvan't Asfford Y6a (huotel Cvalifornia)
botel dan't wfford ua (notel dalifornia) bHotel dCan't wAfford uYa (nhotel dCalifornia) Hbotel Cdan't Awfford Yua (hnotel Cdalifornia)
gotel Caan't xfford 7a (botel Caalifornia) gHotel Cn't xAfford 7Ya (bhotel Clifornia) Hgotel Cna't Axfford Y7a (hbotel Claifornia)
yotel Czn't Affford ja (gotel Czlifornia) yHotel Czan't Aford jYa (ghotel Czalifornia) Hyotel Cazn't Afford Yja (hgotel Cazlifornia)
Hootel Cqn't Acford ta (yotel Cqlifornia) Htel Cqan't Acfford tYa (yhotel Cqalifornia) Htoel Caqn't Afcford Yta (hyotel Caqlifornia)
Hktel Csn't Arford Yaa (hootel Cslifornia) Hkotel Csan't Arfford Y (htel Csalifornia) Hoktel Casn't Afrford Ya (htoel Caslifornia)
H9tel Cwn't Agford Yz (hktel Cwlifornia) H9otel Cwan't Agfford Yza (hkotel Cwalifornia) Ho9tel Cawn't Afgford Yaz (hoktel Cawlifornia)
H0tel Cxn't Atford Yq (h9tel Cxlifornia) H0otel Atfford Yqa (h9otel Ho0tel Caxn't Aftford Yaq (ho9tel Caxlifornia)
Hltel Cann't Avford Ys (h0tel Callifornia) Hlotel Ca't Avfford Ysa (h0otel Caifornia) Holtel Ca'nt Afvford Yas (ho0tel Cailfornia)
Hitel Cam't Adford Yw (hltel Cakifornia) Hiotel Camn't Adfford Ywa (hlotel Caklifornia) Hoitel Canm't Afdford Yaw (holtel Calkifornia)
Hottel Cah't Yx (hitel Caoifornia) Hoel Cahn't Yxa (hiotel Caolifornia) Hoetl Canh't Afofrd Yax (hoitel Caloifornia)
Hofel Caj't Afcord (hottel Capifornia) Hoftel Cajn't (hoel Caplifornia) Hotfel Canj't Affcord (hoetl Calpifornia)
Ho5el Cab't Afrord (hofel Caliifornia) Ho5tel Cabn't (hoftel Calfornia) Hot5el Canb't Affrord (hotfel Calfiornia)
Hohel Can''t Afgord (ho5el Caljfornia) Hohtel Cant (ho5tel Caljifornia) Hothel Cant' Affgord (hot5el Calijfornia)
Hoyel Can'tt Aftord (hohel Cal9fornia) Hoytel Can' (hohtel Cal9ifornia) Hotyel Can't Afftord (hothel Cali9fornia)
Ho6el Can'f Afvord (hoyel Callfornia) Ho6tel Can'ft (hoytel Hot6el Can'tf Affvord (hotyel Calilfornia)
Hogel Can'5 Afdord (ho6el Calofornia) Hogtel Can'5t (ho6tel Hotgel Can't5 Affdord (hot6el Caliofornia)
Horel Can'h Affoord (hogel Calkfornia) Hortel Can'ht Affrd (hogtel Hotrel Can'th Affrod (hotgel Calikfornia)
Hoteel Can'y Affkrd (horel Cal8fornia) Hotl Can'yt Affkord (hortel Cal8ifornia) Hotle Can'ty Affokrd (hotrel Cali8fornia)
Hotsl Can'6 Aff9rd (hoteel Calufornia) Hotsel Can'6t Aff9ord (hotl Caluifornia) Hotesl Can't6 Affo9rd (hotle Caliufornia)
Hot3l Can'g Aff0rd (hotsl Califfornia) Hot3el Can'gt Aff0ord (hotsel Caliornia) Hote3l Can'tg Affo0rd (hotesl Caliofrnia)
Hotfl Can'r Afflrd (hot3l Calicornia) Can'rt Afflord (hot3el Calicfornia) Hotefl Can'tr Affolrd (hote3l Califcornia)
Hotrl Affird (hotfl Calirornia) Affiord Calirfornia) Hoterl Affoird (hotefl Califrornia)
Hot4l Afforrd (hotrl Caligornia) Hot4el Affod Caligfornia) Hote4l Affodr (hoterl Califgornia)
Hotdl Affodd (hot4l Calitornia) Hotdel Affodrd (hot4el Calitfornia) Hotedl Affordd (hote4l Califtornia)
Hotwl Affo4d (hotdl Calivornia) Hotwel Affo4rd (hotdel Calivfornia) Hotewl Affor4d (hotedl Califvornia)
Hotell Affogd (hotwl Calidornia) Hote Affogrd (hotwel Calidfornia) Hotel Afforgd (hotewl Califdornia)



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